Married Life: Help! My Husband Has No Sex Drive Anymore!

It’s not at all uncommon for older men and men who have been in monogamous relationships for quite some time to develop a low sex drive. While sometimes this isn’t something that affects them adversley (after all, it’s not like they’re missing someting they don’t want), it can cause a strain on the relationship when both partners aren’t sexually satisfied. Every woman has a right to and deserves a sex life that is satisfying for them, so here’s how you can talk to your partner about your concerns about his decreased sex drive.

My husband says he has no sex drive anymore and tells me it?s no big deal. But I like it and want it from him, what do I do?

–YouTube Viewer

Talk To Your Partner About Your Feelings

The first thing you need to do is express your feelings to your partner. You may have already hinted around about it, but if you haven’t confronted him one on one with the issues you’re having, there is a big possibility that he has no idea that his lack of sex drive is bothering you. However, how you approach the situation with your partner will determine whether it will end in a fight or if you will actually get to make progress towards solving the problem. The most important thing not to do when having this conversation with your husband is to be critical or suggest that it is his fault in any way. Often, when men get older, their sex drive naturally diminishes, just when a woman’s sex drive is on the rise. Cruel joke from Mother Nature? Perhaps. But it most certainly isn’t his fault. Instead of telling him what is wrong with him or suggesting that it is his “problem,” let him know that your sex drive is higher and you’re craving more sex. Let him know that you want to have sex with him and that he turns you on. Ask him about the possibility of getting help so you guys are more in sync in the sex department.

Make A Visit To The Doctor

Lots of things can contribute to a man’s decreased sex drive, including a whole host of medical issues along with age. Is he taking some medications that might be responsible? Is his diet full of processed or frozen foods and foods with no nutritional value? Is it simply an age thing, or is there a deeper lying problem? Your husband’s medical doctor can rule out any physical reason for his lack of sex drive and may even be able to take him off some medications that might be affecting his libido or even simply change the doseages. Never allow your husband to quit taking his medication or reduce the amount of medications that he is taking without his doctor’s consent. If your husband smokes or drinks, work with him to quit. Start keeping foods rich in vitamins in the house, such as fresh fruits and vegetables like bananas or fresh spinach for salads. Your husband’s doctor may even be able to prescribe a medication that can help increase his desire for sex, provided there is nothing else causing the issue.

You Have A Right To A Good Sex Life

Every person – man or woman – deserves to be satisfied with their sex lives. Human beings are sexual and they were designed to be, so there is nothing wrong with you for having strong sexual desires. It is not at all out of the ordinary for married couples to have issues with their sex lives, but this doesn’t mean that you have to assume it happens to everybody and there’s nothing you can do about it. There are many things you can do about an unsatisfying sex life, and talking to your partner and going to the doctor with him are just the first steps. You can also try doing things that you know turns him on, such as wearing lingerie or a certain outfit or acting out one of his deepest, darkest sex fantasies. Failing that, you can consider an open marriage with your partner or you can get a few sex toys to keep in the drawer by your bed when you’re turned on. While masturbating by yourself may seem like you’re going behind your partner’s back, it doesn’t have to be like that at all. Instead, don’t be shy about letting him know what you’re doing. Chances are, he’ll want to join in when he sees how sexy you look pleasuring yourself and just how much fun you’re having.


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