Hard to believe the holidays are just around the corner! For some of us, that’s good news – while others of us are likely dreading the... continue reading
Hard to believe the holidays are just around the corner! For some of us, that’s good news – while others of us are likely dreading the upcoming months. Although many people look forward to this time of year, there’s no denying we face countless stresses starting now and lasting through the end of the year – if not beyond. For this reason it’s not unusual to see a spike in instances of adultery during the holidays. Beyond the “basic” role that stress plays in adulterous relationships, I’ve come up with a number of reasons why it can be even more tempting to engage in a dalliance at this time of year.
Why Adultery Is Higher During The Holidays
- Sex has no calories – ok, this one’s pretty obvious! There are plenty of activities that involve a lot of stress and a lot of extra eating! Sex is a way to absolve yourself of both … unless it’s with someone other than your partner. In which case, the stress relief is only momentary – and you’ll be left with an affair, which is a lot worse than a few extra pounds.
- People go into emptiness during holidays, regrets, family they miss, happiness and sadness – as I mentioned, the holidays can be difficult for people. If your partner isn’t emotionally available during this time, things can get even harder. The solution here is not to let that push you into the arms of someone else, but to work things out with your significant other so you can face the holiday challenges together.
- People are more vulnerable – this goes hand-in-hand with the above statement. The good news is, this is a time of year where people are taking time off, spending time with family and friends. So take advantage of that and share your emotions with someone you’re close to – don’t take it out in the form of infidelity.
- People drink more and inhibitions are lower, more prone to sex – ’nuff said. You don’t want to be next years’ sad story.
- During the holidays there are more parties – this means more people are wearing sexy clothes, dancing together, drinking (as mentioned above) going home together. This lowers inhibitions and can make it easier to make a mistake you’ll regret. The best advice here is perhaps the most obvious – know your limits.
As a general rule, I tell people not to drink at work-related events, including holiday parties: it’s just too easy to let yourself go, especially when the people around you aren’t setting the greatest examples! If you’re worried things will end badly, you can politely decline to attend certain festivities!
Another tip is – DON’T DANCE! At least not with a co-worker and definitely not someone with whom you may be feeling a bit of heat. Bring your significant other to such events – enjoy their company, dance with them, go home with them and if there IS someone at work that could potentially lure you to cheat, introduce them to your partner as a way of staying honest! I mention the importance of this introduction – and how to handle it – in my book, “Make up, Don’t Breakup.”
- People are eating more sweets during Christmas, sweets have a biochemical effect on stress. Causes more acting out behavior. Comfort foods plays on stress in a negative way cause more sexual cravings. I know – it’s frustrating that it seems we’re getting assaulted even from our faithful friend, food. But again, being aware of your limits, having people you can share your stresses with, and trying to not become too stressed in the first place are all good ways to protect yourself against having a holiday affair!