Too Comfortable? What to Do When Your Man Gets Complacent and Stops Trying

In the first days and weeks of dating and courtship, everything is exciting, exhilarating, rosy, and wonderful. Ah, the joys of lust and the magical infatuation phase of a new relationship.

But then after a while, sometimes just a short while, many people (yes, both men and women) let themselves get comfortable and stop trying so hard. The new relationship is now ‘set in stone’, and they assume it’s a given they’ll still have that new partner tomorrow.

After months of surprises, flowers, chocolates, and romantic candlelit dinners, it’s hard to see all that end so abruptly. Not only that, but you want the romance to blossom and grow, not just to continue as it was!

For whatever reason, men tend to be particularly bad about this – taking their new girlfriend (and yes, especially their wife) for granted. What’s even worse is that concerns or complaints about the change in attitude and behavior are typically met with defensive and resentful responses, if they don’t fall on deaf ears all together.

You had a great thing and don’t want to break up… but what do you do?

What can you do to make him treat you like he used to – to bring the romance back into your relationship?

Here are our thoughts on this topic. Be sure to read the question, then watch the video and leave your thoughts below.

Here’s the full story…

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

We’ve only been together for 4 months and I’m noticing that my boyfriend isn’t doing certain things that he use to do and I’ve mentioned it to him a few times but he hasn’t come around. All he says is “sorry” and “I hear you”.

I spoil him (Cook, clean, rub his back) which I enjoy doing because I love to see him happy but then again I don’t want to get the short end of the stick either.

I wonder if I should take a step back, but then I don’t want to push him away and make him think that I don’t want him. He is used to dating women that need materialistic things and he feels that as long as he provides me with those things that I should be happy.

I’ve explained to him that I make my own money and I can provide for myself, what I need is a man that adores me and cuddles and says sweet things in my ear.

Don’t get me wrong he is a good guy, but I want to nip this in the rear before it gets out of control. Please Help!!!

- Angelina


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