Just about everyone craves some sort of excitement in their life, and some people push boundaries to find it. Anything from skydiving to having a physical, emotional or financial affair.
If you’re lacking excitement in your relationship and are heading into dangerous territory (i.e., considering some kind of infidelity), know that wanting to seek the high that comes from a risky experience is normal, but how you handle the situation can make or break your relationship.
People are looking for novelty, for that dopamine high we get when we try something new and adventurous. Unfortunately, many people sacrifice a relationship they’ve worked hard to build on the quest for that high.
There are ways to recreate these feelings with your partner, eliminating the need to look outside your relationship. You know those feelings you had when you first met? That’s the newness and excitement you’re looking for. Bring new elements into your relationship, and help yourself fall back in love with your partner.
Consider agreeing to commit to a “contract” for financial fidelity. Here are a few things you should work out under this contract:
Make a decision to fall in love again.
Fidelity, both sexual and financial, results from intent to REMAIN in love. These types of commitments don’t just happen. A strong relationship may feel fun and exciting at first, but it’s not based on those feelings! It’s normal that these initial impulses start to fade, but you have to commit to growing your love stronger than it was before.
Treat each other like you did at the beginning.
Why does it seem to be the case that we only hurt the ones we love? We tend to show our “best selves” to the people who play less-important roles in our lives. Aside from learning to be nice to each other again, and learning to treat each other respectfully, bring back things that you did when you first met – and feel free to spice it up. Make these activities your top priority!
A touch CAN be magical!
It can get your hormones flowing and build attraction. Rediscover romance by bringing physical connection, at whatever lever you’re comfortable with, back into your life.
Give up your old money relationships
Just as you would have to do if you had an affair and decided to work things out with your partner, you must give up your old ways of dealing with money and re-map these problem areas with healthy habits.