How To Talk To Her About Masturbation

Masturbation can greatly improve your sex life, especially if she masturbates. It will be much easier for her to orgasm and the overall quality of sex for both you and your partner will increase dramatically. However, not all women masturbate. This can be due to a number of reasons, but if you want to broach this subject with your girl, you’re going to have to talk about it. Here’s how to talk to her about it comfortably, without letting things get weird.

Why You Want Her To Masturbate

Female masturbation is so important is because it helps women learn what feels good to their bodies. When women can experiment in privacy and can learn their bodies better, they become more responsive lovers who can guide you in your quest to bringing them greater sexual satisfaction.

The problem is that a large percentage of women who have masturbated are ashamed or embarrassed to admit they do it. While society pretty much accepts male masturbation, it still views female masturbation as somewhat taboo. Plus, women today were probably raised in households where such things were simply not discussed. Many adult women are shocked when they finally discover that their mothers were also masturbating all that time.

Knowing this is important because you may face difficulty when it comes to talking about masturbating with your partner. Now, of course, some women have no problems broaching the subject. Others, however, are more timid. To be successful, you’ll have to feel your way through the conversation.

Sample Conversation About Masturbation

This sample conversation should give you some idea of how to begin the discussion and how to steer it in the right direction. Of course, the conversation might not go exactly like this and your lover may have different responses than the one here. However, this sample can at least give you the gist of where to take the conversation.

Also, keep in mind that while not all sex conversations should take place in the bedroom, this one may be a good one to have on the bed while both of you are feeling a little amorous. That way it will make what comes next a little easier.

You: “Can I ask you something, baby?”

Her: “What?”

You: “Do you ever get yourself off?”

Her: “What do you mean?”

You: “You know, do you ever masturbate?”

Her: “I’m not going to tell you that.”

You: (keeping the conversation light and playful): “Come on, why not?”

Her: “It’s private.”

You: “I masturbate. Sometimes when I see how hot you look I, get so turned on that I can’t help myself. Don’t you ever feel that way?”

Her: “I’m not going to tell you.”

You: “I think it would be really hot to watch you get yourself off.”

Her: “Really?”

You: “Absolutely! But since you don’t do that . . . “

Her: “Maybe I’ve done it a couple of times.”

You: “Does it feel good?”

Her: “Not as good as being with you.”

You: “Maybe you could show me how good it feels.”

Her: “You want me to masturbate in front of you?”

You: “I think it would be really sexy.”

At this point, your partner may or may not agree. If she does agree, sit back and watch quietly. Don’t try to get involved or to offer words of encouragement. Pay attention to how she pleases herself. For example, does she use a toy or her hand? This can be very useful information for you because if you want to provide added stimulation during intercourse then you can use whichever method she normally prefers.

What If She Doesn’t Want To?

Of course, there’s a good chance that your partner may not be eager to pleasure herself in front of you. If that’s the case, you can always offer a compromise. Instead of you watching from inside the bedroom, ask her if you can tape her masturbating. You’d be somewhere else in the house or gone completely, but the videotape or DVD would record her masturbating in private. You’d be able to see her in action without her feeling as if she’s invading your privacy.

If she doesn’t go along with that idea, then you may need to drop the subject for a little while. That doesn’t mean you can’t go ahead and start experimenting with methods of clitoral stimulation. You may also have a partner who has honestly never masturbated. In that case, she may not be able to give you much feedback about what feels good to her because she probably won’t know. That’s not a bad thing; it just means you’ll be doing a lot of trial and error.

It also means that you’re going to need good communication so when you do hit upon something that sends pleasure racing through her body she lets you know.


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