Orgasm Tips – How The Orgasm Cycle Works In Men And Women

An orgasm is the icing on the cake when it comes to sex, but men and women don’t experience an orgasm the same way. Here’s how to understand the difference.

The “Human Sexual Response” is a cycle of 4 stages. They are:

  • Excitement
  • Plateau
  • Orgasm
  • Resolution

Stage One – Excitement

This happens the first instance you see a scrumptious fox on the street (or on TV). Really, any physical or psychological event that causes parasympathetic nerve stimulation can commence the cycle. The stimuli vary and may also take the form of a sound, emotion or a naughty thought.

Things get ugly right away – your heart starts racing, respiratory rates shoot up, blood flow to the genitals increases. In seconds, little Johnny would have grown a few inches. Your scrotum thickens and the testes rise. It’s official, you’re horny.

A woman similarly experiences increased blood flow to the genital area, causing her clitoris to swell. The vagina increases in diameter & length, her cervix and uterus are pulled up. She starts producing more lubrication and is getting very wet. Her breast and nipples become erect, and she starts breathing heavily as heart and respiratory rates shoot up.

Now, while there are many similarities in how the genders experience Excitement, there is one glaring difference. Generally, MEN GET HOT IN AN INSTANT. Snap! And we’re good to go. Women need a reasonable time. For the life of us, we cannot understand why it takes a woman ages to be ready. For her part, she can’t comprehend the ridiculous speeds with which guys can be neutral one second and insanely horny the next.

Recognize this distinction in arousal speeds. This single disparity will snowball through intercourse. Because they get aroused in an instant, men will often misjudge the readiness of their partners as they lustfully advance to the rest of the stages. As a result, women often feel left behind, even left out of the SEX. Not good.

Stage Two – Plateau

“Plateau” may bring images of restful leisure, but don’t be mislead, PLATEAU is a turbulent stage – no restful leisure here. Remember those ugly things that take over your body during the Excitement Stage? Well, they continue with full abandon during Plateau.

Heart rate reaches as high as 175 lustful beats a minute. Respiratory rates remind you of your track and field days, (who says sex isn’t a sport?) Your penis undergoes extreme congestion and you’ll be seriously thinking if it can explode or fly off your body. This is where you do most of the works – kissing, sucking, penetration, sexual positions etc.

Stage Three – Orgasm

Orgasm, this is the money-maker right here. Lasting only a few seconds, O’s are considered the most ecstatic moments of a person’s existence. After tension building in stages 1&2, blood congestion in the genitals is suddenly and decisively expelled through muscular contractions. This may sound straightforward, but the euphoria of discharging built-up tension sends people through the roof, profanity may be the only sufficient way to describe a pleasure-intensive experience.

Male vs. Female Orgasm

ROUND 1 – The First Blow

Who can orgasm faster?

Both male & female, with proper stimulation, can peak in 2 minutes or less. However, consider the labels. A man who ejaculates in a heartbeat becomes a Premature Ejaculator – a woman achieving the same feat, with moans and everything, is called a keeper.

ROUND 2 – Point Of No Return & Refractory Period

The POINT OF NO RETURN (PNR) is the point of stimulation after which no force in heaven or earth can stop a man from having an orgasm.

During masturbation or intercourse, a man crosses a line after which it is impossible to stop climaxing…even if he stops stimulation. It doesn’t matter if the security guard is about to walk in on them, he will climax, it’s going to happen and there’s nothing anybody can do about it. (Premature ejaculators should back-off or tone down stimulation before reaching PNR.)

Here’s the thing: Women don’t have PNR. Even when she’s on the verge of having an orgasm, you can easily frustrate her orgasm by suddenly changing the rhythm or focus of stimulation, for example. You have to build and stimulate a woman ALL THE WAY, plus the follow through.

Looks like women got the raw deal here, huh?

Not really. There’s something to balance this out – the REFRACTORY PERIOD. Guess what – only men have them too! This is the few minutes after orgasm when the penis begins limping, during which it’s impossible to reach orgasm.

Post climax, the Refractory Period sets in and no force in heaven or earth can make a man cum. A woman may give the best head, but it’s not going to happen, and there’s nothing you can do about it, Anna!

Women don’t have this Refractory Period. Whereas an orgasm returns men to pre-arousal levels, an ‘O’ brings Eve to pre-orgasmic levels. They simply return to blissful levels of the Plateau, capable of approaching orgasm again. That’s why they can hit a string of climaxes – also known as multiple orgasms!

After catching her breath, and about half a minute of extreme clitoral sensitivity, she can simply continue like nothing happened. If she so desires, she can jump off the cliff again and again like an Energizer bunny without any refractory bother. Only guys have the PNR and the RP.

ROUND 3 – Staying Power

For guys, an orgasm often signals the end. For many women, it’s really just the beginning – sort of a warm-up.

She may feel perfectly satisfied after one soulful blow, but she can definitely gun for more. While men find subsequent orgasms less satisfying and more difficult to build, women stack theirs – which means subsequent O’s are easier to build and can be stronger in intensity.

Ensuing blows are sweeter, deeper, more satisfying than the first one, some ladies even have problems when reaching the 4th or 5th because they don’t wish to stop anymore! They enter an “orgasmic cloud” where climaxes become blurred one from another and the whole experience blends into one long-lasting orgasm. It becomes an orgasmic overdrive and if not for sheer exhaustion, they wouldn’t retire.

It may take a girl some time to heat up, but she sure makes up for it later.

STAGE FOUR – The Resolution

After all that orgasmic hooplah, comes the Resolution – the period when genitals return to their unaroused state.

If men don’t gun for another climax after the Refractory Period, then the Resolution Stage automatically sets in. Since women have no refractory period after orgasm, they simply return to pre-orgasmic levels of the Plateau until they decide enough is enough.


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