Sex gets boring when you’re monogamous – but does it have to? Should you resign yourself to lame sex just because you’re in an exclusive relationship with someone? Of course not. Part of the benefits of being in a steady relationship is being comfortable enough with someone to try new things and go a little bit outside your box. Here’s how you can heat up your sex life – tonight.
Take A Break
A lot of couples that are in a sex rut just keep trying to have great sex with each other, but it always ends up being mediocre no matter how hard they try. Instead, remember the quote “absence makes the heart grow fonder” and apply it to this situation. Plan to take a break from sex all together for a few weeks. This may seem like the exact opposite of what you want to do, but abstaining from sex for a little while will actually make it hotter when you do get back together.
Give A Foot Or Back Rub
No, not an erotic massage. This actually isn’t going to get you sex right away – but it will help your partner to become more open with their bodies and more receptive to your touch. Next time your partner has a hard day at work, grab a little massage oil and give them a great rubdown. Really get into it and do it well. Make it good, and show them that you truly do care for them. This act of complete selflessness and genuine interest in how they feel will help them open up to you sexually.
After being in a relationship for awhile, you tend to take your partner for granted. We all do it, but getting too comfortable contributes to a boring sex life. Next time your lover spends a lot of time getting ready, puts on a new outfit or does something out of the ordinary to look good, make sure you pay them a compliment. Let them know you still find them sexy and attractive. Take this a step further and compliment your partner for something completely ordinary. Guys will enjoy a compliment on their hard work or something they’ve fixed while women respond well to compliments on their ideas.
Touch Each Other
Couples who have been together for a significant amount of time find that they don’t touch each other as much. Not necessarily just in the bedroom, but in general. They may avoid brushing up against each other or simply keep their hands to themselves more often. Improve your sex life with your lover just by making an effort to touch them more every day. Hold hands in the car while you’re driving to work or take time for a prolonged hug when you get home. Don’t let a day go by where you don’t touch your partner several times a day, both casually and passionately.
Remember when you used to kiss your lover just for the sake of kissing? In fact, you probably kissed for hours without ever thinking of what was going to happen next. Bring that back to life in your current relationship by having a good old fashioned make out session with your lover. Put on a great movie (but maybe something you’ve seen before so you aren’t tempted to get too engrossed in it) and start softly kissing your partner’s neck.
Move to their lips and make it clear that you want to make out. Don’t let things progress past making out or heavy petting. Then, go to bed without ever thinking of having sex or where the kissing will lead. It won’t be long before your lover can’t stand it anymore!
Do Something Taboo
Part of what makes sex boring in a monogamous relationship is that things stop being “taboo.” You start expecting things a certain way and know what’s going to happen next. Shake things up a bit by doing something with your partner that is “taboo” or slightly outside of your box. Instead of doing what you normally do in the bedroom, take it out on the couch or even outside to the yard or in the car. Bring in a new sex toy or try bondage for the first time.
When you’re with someone you completely trust and love, you have the benefit of being able to try new things without the fear of judgement. You can be open and honest about what you like and what you want to try – and the same goes for them. Take advantage of the opportunity and do something with them you’ve never done before!