Sex doesn’t always stay hot, especially in a steady, long term relationship. But that doesn’t mean you have to get an Rx from your doctor just to be able to have regular sex with your partner. Medications like Viagra and even herbal remedies can leave you with unwanted side effects. Instead, boost your libido NATURALLY with these 7 tips.
Drink A Glass Of Wine
A huge reason for any decrease in sex drive for both men and women is stress. In fact, it could definitely be argued that stress is the number one cause for a lack in libido, whether sudden or gradual. A glass of wine or two before hitting the sheets with your partner will help you relax and forget some of the stresses of the day, which is an important part of getting your body and mind ready for sex – especially for women.
Wine also has healthy antioxidants in it that are essential for sexual function – however, it is important that you don’t overdo it on the wine. If you don’t like wine, grab a brew (beer has a few benefits of its own) but stay away from the hard liquor. Don’t have more than one or two drinks, or you may end up making your libido even lower and men who have had too much to drink tend to have problems getting or keeping an erection.
Quit Smoking (If You Smoke)
Smoking cigarettes can deeply affect your sex life, much more than you think it would. Both men and women can experience a reduction in libido due to smoking, most notably because nicotine is a vasoconstrictor – meaning that nicotine causes blood vessels all over the body to shrink. Since reaching orgasm is pretty dependent on blood flow to sexual organs for both guys and girls, smoking cigarettes can either make a person just not feel like having sex (because less blood is getting to the genitals) or have trouble getting to climax.
Smoking cigarettes can also lead to blockages in the arteries of the penis, leading to problems with erectile dysfunction. If you’re a woman who smokes, reaching orgasm can be near impossible, especially for those women who have smoked for many years. Also, women who smoke take longer to conceive when trying to get pregnant than non-smoking women. Do your sex life a favor and put your cigarette out.
Get A Professional Massage
Again, stress is a huge contributor to a decreased libido. Getting a professional massage – whether you’re a man or a woman – can boost your libido by allowing you to de-stress and relax. It also helps physically relax your muscles and even the simple act of being touched by another human being can be enough to re-awaken your body and your sex libido.
If you’d rather have a more erotic massage before having sex, you probably don’t want to book an appointment with a professional masseuse. Instead, light your favorite scented candle, put on some soft music and massage your partner (or have them massage you). Focus on relaxing their body and mind before you let your hands wander to the naughty areas and you get started with foreplay.
Boost Your Self-Esteem
If you have a low self esteem and don’t like the way you look, you’re definitely not going to want to get naked with your lover as often. If you’re really down on yourself (and you may not even realize it), think about what it is you don’t like about yourself. Are you overweight? Would you rather have a more toned stomach or tighter thighs and glutes? If that’s the case, go exercise! Exercise will not only help you get in shape and raise your self esteem, it will also pump powerful endorphins through your body that actually help contribute to sexual arousal all by themselves.
You can also boost your self esteem with simple things like a spray tan, a haircut, a new outfit or even a Brazilian wax. Think about what you could do personally to build your own self esteem, go do it! You’ll notice that you feel more confident afterwards and feeling great about yourself leads to great things in the bedroom!
Have A Heart To Heart With Your Partner
Women need to be emotionally and physically turned on to really want to have sex. If a woman isn’t feeling emotionally connected to her partner, she’s not going to want to have sex with him as often, if at all. If there are relationship issues at all, they definitely could be contributing not only to your partner not wanting to have sex with you, but you’ll also feel less like having sex if you’re fighting with your partner.
If you’re having relationship problems, sit down and have a heart to heart discussion with them. Go to couples counseling if you need to. Forgive things that you need to forgive and see your partner’s point of view. Do what it takes to work out your issues and when you do, you’ll notice a huge jump in how often you have sex – and how good it is!
Yoga, like any exercise, will help promote blood flow to your body – including those parts responsible for great sex and excellent orgasms – and increasing blood flow throughout your body will heighten your libido in a number of ways. You’ll feel better and have more energy for sex, you’ll feel more confident and sexy, you’ll be more flexible and can get in different sex positions, and overall you’ll feel better all over.
If yoga isn’t your thing, try Pilates or even simple stretching exercises. If you’re not an active person, just start walking. Walk to your mailbox and back, and make it a little farther each time you go. Committing to exercise will help you feel healthier and sexier, and will help improve your sex life more than you would think!
Check What Medications You’re On
There are lots of medications that can contribute to a low libido or even problems having an orgasm or getting and keeping an erection. However, it’s hard to tell which medications may be contributing to your sex problems and it can be especially difficult to narrow down the culprit if you’re taking more than a few medications – and this even includes herbs and supplements! If you’re concerned that a medication you’re taking might be contributing to a low libido or erectile dysfunction, make an appointment with your doctor. Never stop taking any medications without checking with your doctor first!
Some medications that cause sexual dysfunction aren’t going to be ones that you can come off of – like heart disease, mental health and diabetes medications. If this is the case, talk to your doctor about your alternatives. However, if you ARE able to get off one or more medications that are known to reduce sex drive, you’ll notice a jump in your libido!