Many women find it hard to convey to men what they really want in bed. This is due to many reasons from lack of self-confidence to lack of self-awareness.
Another reason is what makes many relationships, sexual and otherwise, fail: the expectation that men can read a woman’s mind and automatically know what she wants in bed!
It is possible for men to discover what works best for you. But this takes a special kind of man who have dedicated himself to becoming a fantastic lover.
However, not all women have the luxury of being with a man who is skilled in bed.
To experience better sex, you should know what turns you on and love yourself enough to take compliments as they are provided. Here are a few tips to keep in mind:
Clear Your Mind
If you’re self-conscious about something, your mind will be consumed by this and so you can’t focus on sexual pleasure. So better get rid of what’s bothering you even before you engage in sex.
For example, if you’re always insecure of how you smell ‘down there’ then make sure you always shower before engaging in sex. If you’re afraid you might accidentally pee while your G-spot is being stimulated, then go have a bathroom break before making love.
Know What Turns You ON
How can you guide him into what brings you pleasure if you yourself don’t know what does?
Some women have a hard time figuring out what turns them on. Compare this to men; for the most part, it’s very easy to figure what what turns a man on.
This can actually be a fun time for you. To know what turns you on, try renting some porn videos and see how you react to what you see. Buy some dirty magazines, romance novels and maybe even some sex toys.
You’ll have to do a bit of self exploration on this one because unlike men, what turns women on is a bit less ‘clear cut’. Once you know what turns you on, experiment with him in bed!
Understand That Men Are Not Mind Readers
Get this straight: Men are NOT mind readers. They cannot instinctively know what brings you the most pleasure. Communicating what is working for you (and making sure that he keeps on doing it) can speed things up towards your female orgasm.
So if you already know what turns you on, don’t be afraid to tell him how best to pleasure you.
For example, if he’s eating you out, tell him exactly how you like to be licked and where.
Communication is key to maximizing your pleasure in bed. The more you know about yourself, and the more you communicate with him, the more pleasure you’ll have. The best part is, you’ll enhance the bond you already have with him by making intimate communication a regular activity in bed.
If You Can Orgasm By Yourself, You Can Orgasm During Sex
Take control of your own orgasm and don’t be so dependant on him to “give” it to you. You can guide him to help you climax during sex, but the quickest way to reach an orgasm (if he’s not sexually skilled) is to help yourself. There’s nothing wrong with it, and trust me, both parties will be happier in the end.
You can apply clitoral stimulation during intercourse, however, not all sex positions are great for self-stimulation. There are a few good positions, like the woman-on-top position that lends itself well to clitoral stimulation.