Turning on a woman emotionally is almost equivalent to turning you on physically. If a woman is in the right state of thinking she can have much more enjoyable foreplay and, hence, equally terrific sex.
While arousing her body may seem like an easier, straightforward task (read more in the next chapter), stimulating her thinking takes patience and creativity (and a little bit of corniness).
Making Eye Contact
Don’t forget: an unexpected “look” can build the anticipation for later. Eye contact and a wink can be a boyish, coy way to captivate her. So can capturing her stare and giving her a genuine smile, stealing a look while she’s doing a chore or some other mundane task that wouldn’t usually warrant a sneak peek, or holding her gaze for longer than a split-second.
The Lost Art Of Kissing
What happened to kissing? Does it die out after you hear the minister say, “You may kiss your bride”? I have listened to so many of my married friends say, “I miss making out.” We yearn for no-strings-attached fooling around where we can make out without the immediate expectation of sex. There’s something thrilling about going at it like school kids on the couch or in the car (or, better yet, in a secret public place).
A few tips for reviving your kissing techniques and bringing the fun back to old-school make-out sessions:
- Kiss her and let your tongue touch the very edge of her lips. The soft sensations will drive her absolutely wild.
- Use your lips to “nibble” her bottom lip or, if you’re very careful, you can even use your teeth for a gentle bite. Just proceed with caution.
- Kiss her with an open mouth and then pull away ever so slightly, allowing your tongues to continue dancing. Guys seem to really like this form of kissing.
Communicating Freely With Each Other
After years of marriage, talking openly and freely about your sexual needs can be an incredibly daunting exercise, especially if you’ve never done it. But if you want your wife to don a French maid costume or get a little forceful with a leather whip, she’s never going to do it unless you just ask her. The same goes for her.
In other words, one discussion about innermost desires can snowball and affect your general outlook on your entire relationship!
The art of dirty talk is different from the aforementioned intimate talk – dirty talk is, well, more risqué.
A common misconception is that dirty talk has to be raunchy and vulgar, but it can take on a wide range of forms. It’s really about the type of couple you are and the terminology that will get you the best reaction (you don’t want to insult her if she’s embarrassed about you using words she considers foul).