Q&A: First Time Sex – I Didn’t Bleed. Is That Normal?

First time sex feels different for everyone. It may hurt or feel tight, or it may feel great. You may have heard that girls bleed when they lose their virginity. Many years ago, a woman’s blood on her husband’s bedsheets was proof that his bride was a virgin when he married her. Do all girls bleed after having sex for the first time?

Question: I am a young teenage girl and recently in September I lost my virginity to a guy I didn’t really care about. It hurt a bit, but I didn’t bleed.  Recently I had sex with a guy I have been crazy about for years, and it hurt a lot worse then my first time but I still didn’t bleed. Is there something wrong with me? Or is this natural? 

P.S. There was protection used both times. I don’t want anyone to think I’m a bad person.

–YouTube Viewer

Not All Girls Bleed

While many girls do bleed after having sex for the first time, some girls don’t. This is perfectly normal and natural. If a girl does bleed after losing her virginity, it may be simply a few spots, but it can also be heavier like a period flow. It can last just a few minutes or a few hours, and sometimes can last the better part of a day. If you bleed very heavily after having sex for the first time, or continue to for several hours or more than a day, make an appointment to see your doctor right away.

What Causes Bleeding After Sex?

Girls are born with a protective “covering” over their vaginal openings called a hymen. Most of the time it does not cover the opening completely, but usually has a small hole in the middle to allow for menstrual flow to escape. During sex, however, the hymen is broken because a penis is generally bigger than the small hole in the hymen. When the hymen is broken, this often causes some mild bleeding and is perfectly normal. However, since not all girls bleed after having sex for the first time, there must be other ways that the hymen can break – and in some cases, it doesn’t break at all or was never really there in the first place.

Other Ways The Hymen Can Break

One of the reasons that virginity never could be “proved” by blood on the sheets after a woman has sex for the first time is because the hymen can break a number of different ways, before a girl even thinks of having sex. The hymen can break while horseback riding, a bumpy SUV ride, or when inserting a tampon for the first time. In the case of a tampon breaking the hymen, you may never know that your hymen broke because you would most likely have mistaken the blood for your menstrual flow. If you don’t bleed after having sex for the first time, it doesn’t mean that you are unhealthy or something is wrong with you. Just remember to have your annual exams and use protection during sex to stay safe and healthy.


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