What Does It Take To Be Great At Lovemaking?
A great lover’s heightened sensuality is his ace. He understands what the senses are for and rouses them with full abandon. He offers stimulus bombardment and makes a woman feel so alive. With him, she experiences excitement, exhilaration, romance, danger, passion, even cluelessness. With the sensual one, sex becomes something else entirely.
The boring dude, his antithesis, couldn’t even stir up emotions and he barely knows how to touch – he thinks sex is a penis and vagina affair. He’s so dull and mundane, being with him is like watching paint peel.
So take your pick – do you want to be sensual or boring? One type of guy gets laid much more than the other.
Can you guess which one?
Mastering Your Senses
But to be a sensual lover, you need to forget about learning “sex tips” and instead, master your senses. Not just during lovemaking, but in daily activities also. What you are in daily living easily translates in the bedroom. You can’t live a hurried and harried existence and expect to be a sensual phenomenon in bed.
Don’t go running around and missing the stream of stimulation life offers you. A high-paced lifestyle may accomplish you a million things, but it makes you default on 10 million others. Speed makes stimulation dissipate rapidly giving the brain no chance to process it. Result? No perception.
Imagine driving your car at 100 miles per hour. Look out the windows. The view moves so fast so you can’t really see much, you’re bound to miss on some important details. You could have missed “the-one-that-got-away,” the woman of your dreams, walking her poodle on the side of the road. So she got away – again.
Now, imagine driving at 20 miles per hour. Notice that things become clearer this time. You see that girl from years ago and scheduled a night out with her. You see the coffee table and bargained successfully for it.
It’s a totally different ballgame; it’s a totally different life! All because you moved slower. No, this is not a motivation to be late for meetings or miss your deadlines. This is a call for AWARENESS – honing your senses and connecting with your surroundings.
Sometimes, this requires some slowing down.
How To Slow Down And Take Stock Of Everything
Go to your kitchen. Open the refrigerator, take out a fruit. (Notice how cold that thing is?) Wash it. Now, close your eyes. Close them shut. Hold the fruit near your snout and give it a whiff. Smell its essence.
Next, with eyes still closed, let your teeth slowly sink into that thing. Have a bite, feel every fiber snap with the force of your mandibles and let nature’s juice cascade into your tingling tongue. Savor every drop. Is it sweet? Sour? Bitter?
How was it?
When your eyes were closed, all visual concerns ceased – you were able to zero-in on smell & taste. Did you notice how these senses became more potent?
That’s the power of focus. When a sense is completely blocked, you experience an instant upgrade on the others. The remaining channels become more lucid and clear.
How To Translate This To Sex
People close eyes when kissing not only to avoid cross-eyes, but for a more intense preoccupation of the liplock. This also explains why sight-impaired people have elevated sense of hearing and touch – it compensates for the lost of sight. That’s why Stevie Wonder has one of the sharpest ears in the music industry.
Train your senses in a similar manner. Block stimulation from one, and focus on another. For example, mute the TV and notice an increased ability to read body language and facial expressions.
Or listen to the TV like a radio and notice the range and tones of people hosting a talk show. Close your eyes and get a whiff of that hot pepperoni pizza. It will make the whole eating experience a thing of beauty.
Once you start doing this on a daily basis, you will start doing this while having sex as well, without even thinking about it. You will automatically close your eyes and breathe in your partner’s scent and taste. You will automatically begin to savor every sensation and you’ll be going slow enough that she’ll be able to savor them too.
In essence, you will BE the sensual lover!