What To Do When HE Is Lazy In Bed!

Sex tips can often help you get out of a rut, especially when you’re putting more effort in than your lover. Many times in a relationship, the sex gets boring because one or both partners get comfortable and start doing the same thing over and over. If you want a super hot sex life, you have to bring variety to the table! Use these sex tips to get him trying new things!

Normal Sexual Progression In A Relationship

Often, sex can get pretty lame when you’re in a relationship – especially if your relationship is long term and you and your partner are monogamous. Many times what will happen in situations like these is that one or both partners start getting comfortable with the relationship and the sex, and don’t bother to use their imagination to come up with new things. It often happens to guys because once they figure out the “secret formula” to getting their girl to reach orgasm, they stick with it! They don’t want to go trying different strokes, techniques or sex positions because they found what works. If it’s not broken, why fix it, right?

This is not at all uncommon, however, that doesn’t make it any less frustrating. Girls don’t always want “A + B + C = Orgasm” sex. They want passion and variety! They want to experiment. A girl can spice things up in the bedroom but she’s got to have a game plan first.

Stop Bitching

One of the biggest reasons guys get less interested in making sex adventurous over time is because their partners get more and more comfortable griping about this and that. Women often do this because as the “warm fuzzies” begin to wear off as the relationship gets older, annoying habits start becoming more and more apparent. Most of the time, they’re not make-or-break-the-relationship types of things – but as a girl gets more comfortable with her guy, she will often want to “fix” him. She’ll think that by telling him what she doesn’t like that he’ll stop and start doing things her way.

You may think your nagging is letting him know that you don’t like a certain behavior, but all it’s really doing is killing his sex drive. He doesn’t see it as you gently guiding him in the right direction – he sees it as nagging, bitching, griping, etc. He’ll still leave his dirty underwear on the floor but he won’t bother taking yours off and throwing them down next to his.

Make An Effort To Be Sexy

While he probably thinks you’re cute in your flannel pajamas, if that’s all you’re wearing, he’s going to start seeing you as non-sexual and just wonderfully cuddly. While this can be an advantage on those cold days when you just don’t feel like doing anything but snuggling up in your man’s arms, if this is all you’re getting, you’re going to wonder what happened to make your guy not want to have sex with you as much anymore, or just not care about trying new things.

The truth is, he wants BOTH sides of you. Sweet, cuddly and wearing flannels without makeup. But other times, he wants to be reminded that he’s with an incredible sex vixen who will ride him all night long! So make a point to wear lingerie to bed sometimes. And heels. When you look sexy, you feel sexy. When you feel sexy, you look sexy. Don’t forget that confidence is truly the sexiest thing you can wear. Rock it like a bombshell and he’ll be on fire!

Don’t Underestimate Sex Games

A fantasy box is an incredibly fun, non-threatening way to introduce your lover to new things and ideas when it comes giving him sex tips and letting him know what you want in bed. This can be as simple or as elaborate as you and your partner want it to be. You can indulge your crafty side and make a fun fantasy box, or use something you have around the house. The more you put into this fun sex game, the more you get out of it. That is, unless you have some damn good imagination. If you do though, it won’t matter one bit if all you have is bar napkins and a Styrofoam cup.

With the “fantasy box” sex game, you and your partner each get to write a secret fantasy that you’d like to try out. Write a few down, three from each of you is a fun number to start with. What you actually write down can range from tame to super kinky, but agree on how hot you’re going to get before you start – you can always start small and up the ante later. It will be pretty awkward if you write down “Spank my ass hard and call me your whore while having sex doggy style” and his says “french kiss for 10 minutes.”  Consider thinking of different “levels” of how hot you want it to be, and decide on a “level” before you start writing down your ideas.

Throw your slips of paper in the box, mix them up and take turns fishing them out. You will, of course, have much more fun trying them out! This is often all that is needed to rev up a “vanilla” guy – simply because they don’t see the fantasy box as a threat to their ego/manhood/pride like they would if you outright told him what he was doing wrong and gave him sex tips.

Reward Him

Men are awesome like puppies – loving, playful and in need of praise when they do something right. When your man does something especially hot that you’re totally into, make some noise! Do NOT let the opportunity slip away – if he doesn’t hear anything, he’s going to assume he’s done something you don’t like and move on to the next ideas or sex tips. So if you don’t let him know when he does something spot on, you’re really screwing yourself because he’ll never learn what you like!

Let him know how much it turns you on when he does something good. Also, reward him by doing something he really enjoys – like giving him an amazing blowjob. This doesn’t apply only to sex either. You can mix and match. Reward him for a sweet gesture like filling up your car with gas by giving him road head. Or taking him on an impromptu shopping spree at the manly store of his choice. Either way, so long as you reward him for anything he does that pleases you. Because when you do, he’ll want to do it again!


Related Articles

read more articles on Sex Tips & Advice