Sex Toys: Man Vs. Vibrator

Sex toys are great, but REAL sex is better, right?

In very recent human history, discussion of women’s sexuality has become increasingly acceptable, and her gratification is becoming just as important as a man’s. We are studying the female body more closely, unlocking the secrets to pleasure centers of which we had little previous knowledge. You can practically get a vibrator on every street corner (it’s true, they sell them at American Apparel). And vibrators are vastly superior to men at producing orgasms.

Vibrators Are Not Obsessed With Their Own Penises

The vibrator’s sole function is to get a woman off. It is not frantically poking away at her most sensitive bits muttering, “Come one, come on,” under its breath because it wants to get through her stupid orgasm as quickly as possible so it can get onto its own climax. Instead, a vibrator is very giving. It doesn’t care about it’s own pleasure, and it won’t rush a woman through sex just to get off. It is there for her and her alone.

They Never Complain About Her Smell

No vibrator has ever complained about the way she smells. Just as men are always obsessing about their size, women are worried about their vaginal odor. The fact that it doesn’t naturally taste like passion fruit doesn’t help the insecurity.  Many women have had men comment on their vaginal odor, even when they’re clean and fresh. Sex toys, on the other hand, won’t say a single word.

Let’s face it – your testicles don’t always smell like a bed of roses, now do they? Genitals – male or female – are usually trapped in a pair of pants all day and by the time you get home, you’re probably ready for a shower. Even after a shower, you’re genitals are going to smell like…well, genitals. If you’re uncomfortable with cunnilingus, that is fine. Just don’t make a big deal about how much you hate the taste or smell, or she’ll never be able to get wet with you again.

Vibrators Maintain A Rhythm

They don’t gently stroke her for a minute or two, then audibly sigh, and increase speed and pressure for another minute or two, and then again audibly sigh and repeat until her clit feels so attacked it’s running in fear. Contrary to general male practices, this is not the proper method of stimulation. The rhythm and pressure need to be consistent. It needs to start out slow and then increase as she gets more and more aroused, and many vibrators are programmed to do just this.

However fast or hard you do it depends on the woman and the day, but whatever it is, keep it going. Once you find something she really seems to like, make sure you stick to that move and only that move.  If you get too jerky she’ll be thinking, “What the hell is he doing?” and not, “Oh, this feels so good.” If you change it up, she’ll never reach orgasm. Worse, if you change it up just as she’s ready to climax, you’ll ruin everything.

You want relax her and allow her to appreciate the sensation. If you’re not creating a soothing rhythm, it interrupts her concentration. However, if she’s screaming, “Faster! Faster!” go ahead and speed up. If she’s giving you directions, make sure you follow them! Some men aren’t so lucky – so whatever she tells you to do, do it without complaint.

Her Vibrator Doesn’t Beg For Sex

It just shows up and does its job when she needs it. If she’s had a long day, or if she’s in the middle of something, or if she’s just plain tired, her vibrator will not whine or complain or try to guilt her into using it. Her vibrator patiently waits for HER to be ready. When she is feeling horny, her vibrator has not irritated her to the point of being inutile in relation to her pleasure. And her vibrator has probably lasted longer than most of her relationships.

A Sex Toy Can’t Replace Intimacy

No matter how great sex toys are, they’re not going to replace the much needed intimacy between a man and a woman. This is where YOU come out ahead! So don’t be more concerned with your own orgasm than hers and don’t complain about how she smells or tastes. Maintain a steady rhythm and don’t pressure her to get busy when she doesn’t want to. If you do all of these things AND give her a great emotional connection, she may never go back to her vibrator again.


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