Asking someone out on a first date can be highly nerve-wracking. In fact, fear of rejection can cause people to put off, or even give up on, asking someone out. That’s very unfortunate. Risky though it may be, asking for a first date can be highly rewarding. Though you can never be one hundred percent certain you’ll get the “yes” you’re looking for, you can up your odds. A little planning and skillful flirting can go a long way.
Reading The Body Language
So you’ve met someone that you’re interested in, and you’ve decided to ask them out. What now? Before you set a plan in motion, think over the interaction you’ve had with this person so far. You want to be sure they’ll be at least somewhat receptive to your advances. How did they act when you spoke with them in person? Were they upbeat, laughing at your jokes, and smiling a lot? What was their body language like? Did he or she lean in close when you were talking? Did they ever rest their hand on your arm or shoulder, or even give you a hug at the end of the night? All of these actions are indicators that they’re attracted to you.
If they acted in the opposite manner—closed off, somber, etc.—they probably aren’t interested. Don’t waste your time asking someone out, unless the evidence points to them liking you.
Coming Up With The Right Material For A First Date
If the person you’d like to be dating is a friend of a friend, there’s no shame in doing some reconnaissance work. Ask your friend for a little background on your new love interest. This will allow you to come up with a plan for a date that will be that much more enticing. Besides, your mutual friend may mention your interest to the guy or gal you’re pursuing, which will allow your friend to further gauge their interest in you.
If you don’t have a friend in common, try to recall anything that might have come up during your previous conversations with your intended. Did they mention a favorite band or sports team that you could get tickets to see? Maybe they brought up a movie or show they have been hoping to check out. If your date idea references something they mentioned when talking to you, that will show him or her that you’re very attentive and thoughtful.
Making The Phone Call
Now that you’ve got a date plan in mind and have decided that this individual is definitely interested in you, it’s time to call them up. Never invite someone on a date using email or a text message. In an ideal world, you’d be able to ask them in person, but if you’re not going to see each other soon, phone flirting is your best bet. Be simple and straightforward in your speech, without being forceful or over the top.
Say hello and ask how he or she has been doing, then get right to the point. Tell them how you enjoyed talking to them the last time you saw them. Then ask them if they’d be interested in going out with you to whatever event you’ve decided on. Tell them you’d really like to get to know them better in a one-on-one setting, just to make sure they don’t think you’re asking them to a group hang. Thanks to your advance planning and clear, simple wording, odds are very good you’ll get the yes you’re hoping to hear.