How Can I Tell If My Date Really Likes Me?

Navigating the dating world can be difficult for both men and women. It’s hard to tell what your date’s motivations are and if they really like you or not.

Both men and women can also send mixed messages too, making it even harder for you to figure out what is going on. How can you tell if your date really likes you?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

How can I tell if she’s really into me?

–Jeff, North Carolina

Dating vs. Friends

The first way to tell if your date really likes you is to look at the dating pattern. Are you going on dates with this person alone or are you going on dates with other friends as friends? If you’re going on dates with them alone, do you continue to go out on dates or call each other?

If the answer is that you are dating this person, as in going on dates alone with them and spending time with them, chances are they really do like you. Neither men nor women will continue to date someone and continue to spend time with someone if they’re not at least a little interested.

If you’re dating someone, you can assume they like you enough to give you more chances, and they probably like you a lot!

If you and your date are going out with other people, such as your friends, it can be a little more difficult to figure out if they like you or not.

Body Language

Another way to tell if your date really likes you is to pay attention to their body language. Do they move close to you when they talk to you? Do they touch your arm or your leg as they’re having a discussion with you? If your date seems really interested in you and really does like you, you’ll be able to tell by watching their body language.

Talk To Them

The surest way to find out if your date is really into you is to simply talk to them! You can have a conversation with them that doesn’t put pressure on them or makes them feel awkward. Just be honest.

Talk to them like you would and old friend and ask in a casual way if they’re interested in you and would like to continue dating. Be careful not to ask questions like, “Where do you see this going?” or open ended questions like, “How do you feel about me?”

Make it as easy as possible for them to answer you truthfully. Your best option is a question where they can give you a simple yes or no answer.

If your date does express interest in you, take it at face value! Don’t try to read too much into it. In the beginning of the dating process, your primary goal is to simply spend time with your date, getting to know them and letting them get to know you.

You have a right to enjoy yourself and have fun, and your date does too! Try to keep “relationship” questions out of the picture as much as possible when you’re first dating someone, but that doesn’t mean you can’t casually ask if they’re interested in you! Just make it brief and uninvolved.


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