Great men are hard to find and even harder to keep. So when you find one, don’t ruin your chances of turning it into a great relationship by making these deadly dating mistakes. Remember, attractive men have dated a lot of women, so they know what’s going on. The result? They’ll disappear before you realize you’ve done anything wrong. Here’s how to avoid the top five dating mistakes that women make with men so you can increase your chances of keeping a keeper.
Mistake #1: Sharing Your Feelings With Him Too Early
Men love their freedom and independence - no mysteries there! So when you announce that you love him, it often sets off a trigger that you might be one of those “clingy types.” This will no doubt send him running out the door as quick as he can manage. Play it safe and remember that the early stages of dating should always remain casual.
Only after you get to know each other really well should you pursue anything further. It’s also worth mentioning that you can’t logically convince someone to fall in love with you. Falling in love is a process that happens outside the conscious mind and there’s nothing you can do to make it happen, speed it up or make it stop. It will happen when it happens. It may happen for you well before it happens for him or vice versa. It is wise to keep your feelings to yourself until you’ve been dating them for quite some time or they’ve decided to say it first.
Mistake #2: Trying To Push It Too Far Too Soon
It’s natural to wonder about the nature of your relationship. “Does he want more? Or is this just a fling?” But remember, if you start talking about marriage after only 12 months, you could ruin your chances to take things further. And if you don’t live together, cooking dinner or doing his laundry isn’t a good idea.
A nice meal once in a while is okay, but don’t make it a regular thing. Yes, it’s true, many men are scared of commitment; but just because they don’t want it now, doesn’t mean they don’t want to settle down. They just need time. Let your man take the lead when it comes to announcing the state of the relationship or addressing the marriage, moving in or long term relationship issues. If you surprise him with something he’s not ready for, it will definitely freak him out and these things can’t be taken back once you’ve let them out in the open.
Mistake #3: Being Too Available
You might think this is playing a mind game or being manipulative, but putting your best side forward is also manipulative. Why? Because it’s done to get a desirable outcome. This is simply a reminder to be who you were before you met the man and continue to be that person, rather than use trickery.
Remember that your busy, interesting and fun life only has so much time for him, no matter how much you like him. And remember, men love a challenge, so this actually works in your favor. Don’t put aside everything you did before you met him to make room for him in your life. Instead, continue on about your business just as it was before you met him. He can wait a day or two for a dinner date if you have other things to do and there’s nothing wrong with that.
Mistake #4: Not Being Yourself
Men love confident women with a strong sense of self-worth. Unfortunately, women often try to guess how the man wants them to act and try to accommodate his mold, which leaves very little room for your own personality to shine. (And yes, men do this too.) Instead of trying to be what you think he wants you to be, simply be yourself and let him fall in love with you just the way you are.
Mistake #5: Putting Too Much Stock In Outward Appearances
Believe it or not, it’s NOT make-up, dyed hair, pretty clothes or even nice shoes that attract men, not into a successful long-term relationships anyway! While “looks” is the obvious factor that seems to get an instant response from men, long-term success comes with finding a man who admires and respects you regardless of your exterior. If your man only likes you for your looks, then he doesn’t really love you. Look your best, but don’t go out of your way. Don’t do anything you wouldn’t normally do to make yourself look good. Remember, you want him to fall in love with you.