It’s deceptively simple to sign up to an online dating site, but creating a profile that attracts the right kind of person to you can be a little tricky.
Does it seem like no matter what you do, the wrong people keep contacting you?
Does it really matter what you put in all of those little interest and hobby fields?
The answer is yes – sometimes.
What you say in your headline and in the details, and how you say it, can make all the difference.
Do a person’s hobbies attract a certain type of person? Do online daters even look at the hobbies and interest sections of your profile?
I have a problem with dating online. I spend a bunch of time making my profile “ME”. I let my potential daters know exactly what I am about, but I still get interested people that have nothing in common with me. I’m tired stressing that some of my hobbies are my life. They are who I am. In my case it’s playing my instruments and making records. My thoughts were that the ladies would see how much I stress those facts. I always get interest from ladies I have no interest in. This may sound crazy, but I can’t like someone that is into pop music and I like rock. How do a stress, even more, that I am my interest and I am not interested in any other type of lady?
It can be very frustrating when the wrong people keep responding to your online profile. You can use your headline to ‘qualify’ potential matches from beginning and further narrow it down in your detailed description.
A Great Headline
A great headline should sum up who you are and what you’re looking for in one short and witty sentence.
In this example, some good headlines might be:
“Music is my life. Want to share my life?”
“Let’s make great music together”
“Wanna rock? Only serious music lovers need apply”
“Hard core rocker looking for groupie”
The Devil is in the Details
My grandmother always said that the devil is in the details and I’ve always found that to be true. The details of your online profile should really identify what you’re all about and what you’re looking for in a relationship…
If there are certain types of people that you are absolutely not interested in, say it in your profile but try to keep it positive. If you don’t like pop music, you might say something like.
“Music is my life. To me there is only one great genre of music – ROCK. If you love rock music as much as I do, let’s meet. I do apologize, but if you like POP music, I’m not going to be a good match for you. Yes, I recognize how extreme this must sound, but making great rock music truly is my life and I’m looking for someone who can appreciate this lifestyle as much as I do. Are you the groupie that I’m searching for?”
As for all of those extra check boxes for hobbies and interests… I feel that those are less important unless the website has a matching algorithm that sends you potential matches based on your specific interests and hobbies. If that’s the case, make sure you fill out all of those fields so that you’ll get the best matches.
Some People Just Won’t Get It
Unfortunately, there are some people in this world who will never read the instructions no matter how clear you make them. For those people, you’ll just have to politely excuse yourself and move on to the next profile on your list.
You don’t want to get too harsh in your profile, or you may drive away just the girl you’re looking for. Do make sure that you ask potential daters what kind of music they like and whether or not they would enjoy your lifestyle during your initial communications with them. That will at least save you a little time weeding through the one’s you’re not interested in…
Understanding the Law of Attraction
There is one other incredibly powerful tool that can help you in your search for the perfect match. It’s called the Law of Attraction. A really quick exercise that will help you find just the right person for you is to write down on a piece of paper exactly what you’re looking for in a partner. Try to focus more on how you feel when you’re with this person and less on their physical appearance. Having said that, if you love redheads, write that down too.
Imagine your perfect partner in every detail… (write it down)
Then, every night before your go to sleep, close you eyes and visualize, or imagine being with this person for at least 5 – 10 minutes. Really get into it. What are you doing together? How do you feel when you’re together? What do you hear? What do you smell?
This will get your message out to the Universe. Now it’s your job to act on any hunches, gut feelings, or intuitions that you get over the next few weeks. If you get a weird urge to stop by a store that you’ve never been in – do it. If you have a weird idea to go to a museum – do it. You never know who you might meet while following you intuition.
True love may be just around the corner…