Flirting online should be an enjoyable experience. You should take your time while you are doing it. Getting to know a person, especially online, is almost like having your first date. You are finding out about each other and trying to attract and sustain mutual interest.
Make sure you have “scooped” the person, that you have carefully checked out his or her profile. If the “other” has been good in putting it together, there would have been just enough information offered to reveal an interesting, even captivating personality, leaving just enough to hope that the “scooper” would want to look for more.
Flirting is a sport, like fishing. The woman attracts the man with some nice-looking bait or the man attracts the woman with bait that is just as well nice-looking and uniquely attractive.
Go light and establish an edge. Use light email conversation, but angle on something real that was seen in the profile, something that gave a small flash of the person as special. That special something is what could feature the person for you. It would be entertaining and, hopefully, eventually fulfilling. There’s a lot of advice on online dating that’s pegged on being funny and humorous. Surely, being light, easy-going and humorous could move the fish closer to your net. Your net, itself, must be inviting and charming.
Write Short Emails
Some of the online dating sites have shaped the initial response/reply vehicles to be short comments signifying mere interest. If you are a woman, take your time in responding to the initial inquiries. If you are a man, respond to them easily and effectively. Both of you are lighting a campfire. You want to get the coals burning to an enticing, inviting warmth.
Ask her something about her location. Find out if she wants to talk about her job, don’t assume she does, even though it may be revealed on the profile. Look for things that are uniquely interesting on his profile. Either of you can take your time in getting personal, looking for signs that show the individual revealing more of her or himself.
Take Your Time In The Initial Phases
Both of you may have several people you are responding to, initiating conversation. Again, you want to enjoy these first few moments. You want to create light laughter as people are usually obliged to do at parties, at first meetings. As the emails get longer, you decide to narrow your choices and get into chat sessions with this certain individual. You like the interests and responses each of you have shared and want to expand on them.
If she mentioned children and you have children yourself, slowly reveal your kids to each other. This would most likely be on the profile.
Continue to show and build support and consideration. This is the time where you can grow in honesty, revealing more. You are looking for a good relationship, one that can be sustained, one where it feels “just right” to be open to. It’s like you are building comfortable structures for each other. Chatting, you both will serve up what the person inquires about, keeping it light and not going too far.
All the time, keep asking yourself is this the person you would like to be with, is this an individual you can be comfortable with.
Stick To Your Profile
Profiles show movies, books, activities that people like and pursue. You believe in some ways these activities complement yours. Ask questions concerning it in relation to your own interests. Then inquire about interests and things the other has done that you would like to know more about. Compliment her on her experience. If he expresses a liking for his job, ask him about his interesting experiences with it.
You have so far:
- Taken your time, shown comfort with the person’s profile.
- Have not been too flashy, but have created smiles and laughter.
- Enjoyed and appreciated the first few moments.
Good things don’t happen inordinately fast or quick. You are enjoying subtleties that build refreshing communication.
Don’t Dive To Deep In The Beginning
If the chatting proves okay, and there has been good humor, relaxation, it means you both have accepted and acknowledged a pace, a certain rhythm.
Sitting around the chatting campfire, some of the unusual stuff will come out. Check out some of this, but not all. Wait for the actual dates. Depending on age, experiences, there are several hills and valleys in people’s lives. Maturity shows that people can appreciate that others have had hard or difficult times. If the relationship engenders anything, it will present future soft places for these things to come out.
The initial aim is to see if both of you want to make a move for that first date, where it becomes a pleasure to move from the campfire into the dawn of a new friendship.