Appreciation is Essential for Intimacy


Hope and Antonio are young and living on love. They have the pressures of their jobs, their acquisitions, the things and babies they dream about having some day.

But just now they have the simplicity of neither having too much stuff nor too many demands tugging on them.  This lends itself to quality time spent together that deeply enriches their love lives.

Why She Appreciates Him

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Antonio is from Spain.  Hope is from the United States, where they live.  Hope’s favorite thing is to lay her head in her husband’s lap when he is on the phone with his family.  She loves to hear his side of the conversation in Spanish.

Even when she doesn’t understand all the words, she understands his tone of voice.  She feels his love for his family and their love for him.  In addition, she loves the experience of her husband communicating with people he loves in his native tongue.

It makes her appreciate him more.  The intimacy of her physical closeness and her appreciation of him when he is on the phone with his family is precious to both of them.

Presently, nothing is pulling on Hope’s attention that would tear her away from this unique opportunity to appreciate her husband and enjoy this level of intimacy.  Hopefully, as their lives and finances grow, they will remember to continue this ritual and create new ones.

Intimacy Thrives on Appreciation

Appreciating each other is easy when we are first falling in love!  Beginning with small things like how he places his hand protectively on the small of her back when they walk together or how she gives him that eye-to-eye look that says he is the yummiest thing she has ever seen; couples naturally appreciate each other in the early stages of romance.

As the relationship continues, appreciation and its benefits too often fall to the wayside.  Because it was something that came naturally, giving it attention wasn’t necessary.  Now it is time to be intentional about appreciating your lover.

Appreciating each other can occur any time in any place!  Samantha likes to be around her husband’s friends when he isn’t there.  Because his friends admire him, the way they talk about him when they have Samantha to themselves makes her hot for her husband!  She loves to brag to him about how they brag about him.  He likes it too!

Be Intentional

Natalie loves to cook and has a real gift for it.  She finds that most of the time her large family takes her cooking for granted.  Sometimes, at the end of a meal everyone has devoured, her husband helps her clean the kitchen, sharing with her every detail he especially enjoyed about the meal.

Natalie loves the appreciation and attention, sharing in turn how she accomplished the tastes and textures he so enjoyed.  When they finish cleaning the kitchen, her energy has been revived from all that appreciation and he stands a better chance of getting lucky that night or the next morning!

Susan has a sharp mind that loves to solve problems and attend to details.  Early in their relationship, those skills threatened her boyfriend, John.

Her mental sharpness too often felt like competition.  They went through some difficulties, struggling over John wanting to stifle this particular gift of Susan’s.  Eventually, they worked it out.  Susan’s mental acuity has become a trait John admires and appreciates.  When he does, she feels alive and sexy!

Mark has always felt challenged when it comes to buying gifts for his sweetheart.  He thinks it is a genetic thing.  His dad often missed when it came to buying gifts for Mark’s mother.  He likes to give his girl gifts that will make her life easier.

Sometimes, she wants something a little more romantic.  This year, for her birthday, he bought her a soda water maker.  It turns tap water into seltzer, at which point she can add any number of flavors to create her own soda.  Turns out, she loves it!  She tells him so every time she uses it and he glows with pride every single time.

Mark appreciates being appreciated and his sweetheart loves how he glows with pride just because she appreciated him.  Appreciation creates a yummy circle of energy that pays off repeatedly!  It doesn’t have to be forced or made up.  Opportunities to express it occur throughout every day.

Be on the lookout for the opportunity today, take advantage of it, and see what happens.  It might change your love life!

"The Little Black Book of Sex Positions"

by Dan & Jennifer
(Now Available on Amazon!)

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