Understanding The Difference Between Getting Love And Sharing Love


The feeling of love is the very best feeling in the world, even better than sex or ice cream!

The Bible states in 1 John 4:16 that “God is love.” When our hearts are open, the love that is God comes into the physical body and fills us with the delicious feelings of joy and peace. Love is always available, as available as the air we breathe.

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Yet most people do not go through their days filled with love, joy and peace. Instead, they feel empty and alone, and often turn to various addictions (such as sex and ice cream) to fill the emptiness and aloneness.

Filling the Void With Addictions

One of the addictions many people turn to is the addiction of getting love from others. Coming from the belief that people, rather than our Source, are the source of love, they try in various ways to gain control over getting love from others.

Through physical appearance, accomplishments, niceness, compliments, cuteness, being funny, threats, anger, irritation, and blame, people try to manipulate others into giving them the love, attention, and approval they need. Sometimes this works for the moment, but like food or sex, it is only for the moment. Trying to feel filled through others is an exhausting way to live.

Other people try to get filled through the giving of love. The problem here is that unless you are first bringing love into yourself and then sharing your love from a full place within, the giving of love becomes just another manipulation to get love.

This is caretaking; giving to get. I can tell you from personal experience, since this was my major addiction, that caretaking does not to lead to feeling fill up with love, peace and joy. Rather, it leads to feeling drained, used and resentful, since rarely do others give back the love you hope for.

A Circle of Love

The highest experience in life with another person is the sharing of love. A circle of love is experienced when two or more people are sharing love from a full place within.

We are full of love within only when we have a spiritually connected loving adult self who is intent on taking loving care of ourselves. When our intent is to take full personal responsibility for ourselves physically, emotionally, spiritually, financially, organizationally, and relationally, then we feel loved and safe inside.

Intent Opens the Door

Our intent to support our own highest good opens the door to connection with Spirit and the love that is God fills our hearts and souls. This deeply peaceful and joyous feeling can then be shared with others whose hearts are also open to loving and learning.

The sharing of love is truly an amazing experience. It can happen in person or over the phone. It can happen in letters or email. Time and place are irrelevant. God as love is an energy that can be experienced from any distance. Each of us has the opportunity to be messengers of God when we do our inner work and become able to share love with others.

Getting Love, Sharing Love

The ego wounded self in most people does not understand the vast difference between the getting of love and the sharing of love. Because getting a bit of love from someone feels good, the ego thinks that the best feelings come from getting love. Until you have the experience of bringing God-that-is-love into yourself, you do not realize that loving yourself brings far greater joy than getting love.

And until you are loving yourself, you cannot experience the even greater joy of sharing love with others. There is no addiction, no drug, no food, no experience, that comes close to the incredible joy of feeling the love-that-is-God within and sharing that love with others.

If you have never had the experience of sharing love, you may not realize what you are missing. Sometimes it may seem hard to be motivated to keep doing your inner healing work if you have never experienced the joy of loving yourself and sharing that love with others.

I hope you keep in mind that only by doing your inner work will you ever be able to experience the greatest experience on the planet; the sharing of love!

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