Think You Have to Let Him Call You First? Not Anymore!


I saw a depiction of a young woman calling a man for a date while maintaining her sexy femininity!  It was exciting to witness and I want to share it with you.

I realize that expressing my discomfort over the fact that these days both sexes expect that she will call him for that first date is a favorite drum I beat.

The Little Black Book of Sex Positions
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Time and couples have proven that when a woman allows a man to pursue her, if a relationship ensues, the relationship has a better chance of survival.

That means letting him call her first.  It means letting him speak first with his voice, though she may speak first with her eyes and body language, giving him encouragement to pursue her.

Calling a Man in a Way That Allows Him to Maintain His Masculine Energy

Given that women call men for dates and that men expect them to, here’s how to do it in such a way that he gets to maintain his sexy position holding the masculine energy and she gets to maintain her sexy position holding the feminine energy!

In the movie, “Happy Go Lucky,” Poppy is a thirty-year-old single female, living in London.  With her carefree attitude, it is no surprise that she is a successful grade school teacher.  The fact that she is single doesn’t bother her a bit.  In fact, the romantic relationship she begins doesn’t occur until the very end of the film.

She has a problem with one of her students becoming violent.  A social worker named Tim gets involved.  He turns out to be compassionate and effective.  A handsome man, he and Poppy spark to each other instantly.

After their session with the student, Poppy walks Tim to the door where they have a flirtatious conversation and reveal their interest in each other.  Tim asks Poppy if she would like to go out sometime.  She giggles a flirtatious and humorous affirmation.  He invites her to give him a call and gives her his phone number.

As Poppy’s life is full, she has plans for the weekend and doesn’t get around to calling him until Sunday.  They flirt on the phone until she finally asks, “So, you fancy going out with me sometime?”  They then arrange for the following Friday.  The way the date is depicted on the screen is delightful in its charm.

Later, at his apartment, they make love.  At the foot of his bed, Tim encircles Poppy’s waist with his hands and kisses her repeatedly while she stands in a pose of surrender with her arms akimbo.  When she finally takes his head in her hands and caresses him, her touch is visibly warm and inviting.

The Depth of Their Intimacy

It is riveting as this carefree woman, easily taken for being silly, shows up as an excellent lover.  Their intimacy the next morning as they putter around his apartment reveals the same tender depth.

He takes her home later in the morning because she has an appointment to keep.  She winds up having a stressful day and doesn’t talk to him until the afternoon of the following day.  Their conversation is flirtatious and fun as they revel in the possibility that they are falling in love.

How She Maintained Her Femininity While Allowing Him to Maintain His Masculinity

How did Poppy maintain her femininity, making space for Tim to maintain his masculinity; thereby, creating an energetic field where he would continue to pursue her?

First, Poppy isn’t needy, clingy, or suffocating.  Her life is full.  It isn’t empty because she doesn’t have a man.  When this man comes along, even as she is receptive to his interest and advances, she remains independent and confident.  That is such a turn on!

Confidence is Key

By waiting to call him for that first date, she further communicated her confidence.  She also spoke to him in a language he understood.  When a man is interested in a woman, he may take his time calling her, especially if his life is full.

When a man takes a woman out on a first date, he can take up to three weeks to call her back!  It can take a man that long to realize he misses her and wants to be with her again.  In the meantime, his life is full of work and other obligations.  For her to take a day or two before calling him back feels natural to him.

When they scheduled the date for five days later, she communicated her confidence once again.  Women who feel needful for a man in their life are quick to arrange for a date as soon as possible, preferably the very same day the call is made.  Such quick scheduling communicates a woman’s neediness, serving as a yellow caution flag.

Again, after their first date, twenty-four hours transpire before she hears from Tim.  She had a harrowing experience the day before, yet did not call him to share it with him.  Instead, she processed the experience with her flat mate and best friend, Zoe.

This is a significant part of the recipe for a confident and sexy woman!  Her life is full because not only does she have satisfying work, but also she has close women friends with whom she can talk and listen and they can process their feelings and lives together!

She doesn’t need her romantic relationship to meet all her emotional needs.  If she isn’t currently in a relationship, such independence and confidence make a woman very attractive.  If she is currently in a relationship, it contributes to the health of the relationship and the happiness of the individuals in it!

A man getting to be the man and a woman getting to be the woman within their romantic relationship is delicious.  I am thrilled to discover that a man can give a woman his number, expecting her to call first, while they both maintain their same gender energy.  It bodes well for the day they fall in love!

"The Little Black Book of Sex Positions"

by Dan & Jennifer
(Now Available on Amazon!)

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