How A Girl Sizes You Up (And How To Work It To Your Advantage)

Ask Dan & Jennifer -

For seduction to work, you must understand the way a woman looks at you first. Put your best foot forward and the seduction can begin right away! So let’s talk about “regular” beautiful women for a moment—the ones who aren’t doing stripteases for a living.

Beautiful women, who are constantly being hit on, are naturally going to put up barriers when they get the sense that a guy is sexually interested in them. (This is sometimes referred to as a “bitch shield.”)

What Happens When You Start A Conversation With A Hot Girl

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So when a random guy tries to start a conversation with a hot chick, one of two things will happen:

  1. If she is completely uninterested in the guy, she will ignore him or blow him off as soon as possible. (“Nice to meet you, but I need to go find my friends…”)
  2. If she’s having fun talking to the guy, or finds him interesting or attractive in some way, she will begin to screen him. She will use certain questions and behaviors to elicit responses from him. The manner in which he responds will allow her to form a judgment of him: is this a guy she can picture herself having sex with (or dating), or does he lack the qualities that she is screening him for?

(If so, she might continue talking to him out of politeness, and even give her phone number if he requests it, but there’s no way she’s ever going to have sex with him. She’s already made up her mind about that.)

Your goal, then, is to control the conversation so that you don’t give women the chance to start screening you. You want to “turn the tables” so that you are the one screening them.

How To Get To Where YOU Are “Screening” HER

Remember this—because it applies in and out of the strip clubs. The main things a woman “screens” you for are your status and value. If she senses that your status and value are lower than hers, she knows she doesn’t stand to gain anything by being with you. So she won’t be interested.

If she feels that your status and value are higher than hers, she’ll want to keep talking to you—and she’ll begin to feel attraction, if you push the right buttons.

This has nothing to do with how much money you’ve got, or what kind of car you drive. There are much more important ways in which any guy can demonstrate status and value.

For example, if you give a stripper (or any girl, for that matter) the impression that you know other people at the club, and you’re familiar with her profession and how the whole “game” works, you’re conveying a higher status than the typical customer.

If you tease her during the conversation (instead of trying to kiss her ass) and qualify her (which means you say things that indicate you’re not so impressed by her, and want to find out if she measures up to your standards), you’re also showing status.

Give her VALUE

Providing value means she can tell she will gain something, or improve her situation, by hanging out with you. (In a strip club, a guy’s “value” normally means what he’s carrying in his wallet—but you’re going to attract women by different means, and in a more powerful way.)

Bringing value can be as simple as making her laugh and feel relaxed with you. Other ways of providing value include getting her to share her ambitions and goals (strippers always have some other “plan” for their lives), and encouraging her to go after that goal.

You want women to feel that if they spend time with you, you’re going to make their lives fuller and more exciting, and you’re going to help them grow and better themselves. That’s super-valuable stuff.

"The Little Black Book of Sex Positions"

by Dan & Jennifer
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